• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Skip to footer
IELTS Advantage

IELTS Advantage

IELTS Preparation Courses

  • Success Stories
  • Resources
    • IELTS Writing Task 1 (In 2023)
    • IELTS Writing Task 2 (In 2023)
    • IELTS Speaking (In 2023)
    • IELTS Reading (In 2023)
    • IELTS Listening
    • IELTS Vocabulary
  • Contact Us
  • VIP Course

An IELTS Task 2 Essay Most Students Got Wrong

Home » An IELTS Task 2 Essay Most Students Got Wrong

I recently gave this question for homework to a very high-level class and unfortunately lots of them failed to answer the question correctly. This led to lots of frustration in the group, but they soon figured out what they did wrong.

I thought it was worth looking at this question in more detail so you can prevent the same thing happening on exam day.

Question- Women and men are commonly seen as having different strengths and weaknesses. Is it right to exclude males or females from certain professions because of their gender?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Question Analysis

This is quite a difficult question to answer because of the way it is phrased. In order to answer this question correctly, we should analyse it carefully.

Keywords– Women and men/strengths and weaknesses

Micro-Key words– right to exclude/certain professions/because of gender

Instruction words– give reasons/relevant examples/own knowledge or experience

The first common mistake many students made was answering the question using the keywords and ignoring the micro-keywords. These students wrote an answer about the difference between men and women in the workplace and how certain jobs are better suited to men or women. This is not what the question asks.

The second thing most students did wrong was either not supporting their ideas with reasons or not, including examples from their own knowledge or experience. These students just listed lots of ideas about the difference between men and women in the workplace without fully explaining what they mean and how this is linked to the question.

A good answer would specifically address the micro-keywords i.e. is it right to exclude men or women from certain professions? The most important words here are right, exclude and certain.

Idea Generation

Reasons why it is right to exclude men or women from certain professions:

  • Most men do not have the skills to work in certain professions, such as a nanny.
  • Society does not accept men who work in certain professions, such as a beautician.
  • Some women do not have the physical attributes to work in certain professions, such as a soldier.
  • Society does not accept women who work in certain professions, such as a construction worker.

 Reasons why it is not right to exclude men or women from certain professions:

  • It is unfair.
  • People should not be discriminated against because of their gender.
  • That view has no place in a modern, free society.
  • Excluding women from certain professions harms the economy.

We now need to think about which ideas to choose. I personally believe that women should not be excluded from any profession, but my personal feelings do not matter in an IELTS writing test. I should choose the ideas I feel confident explaining and supporting with examples.

I will, therefore, write about why I think it is right to exclude men or women from certain professions.

Structure

The task is to answer a direct question and it is, therefore, an opinion (agree/disagree) essay and I will follow this structure:

Paragraph 1- Introduction

Sentence 1- Paraphrase Question

Sentence 2- Thesis Statement

Sentence 3- Outline Statement

Paragraph 2- Supporting Paragraph 1

Sentence 1- Topic Sentence

Sentence 2- Explain Topic Sentence

Sentence 3- Example

Sentence 4- Concession Sentence

Paragraph 3- Supporting Paragraph 2

Sentence 1- Topic Sentence

Sentence 2- Explain Topic Sentence

Sentence 3- Example

Paragraph 4- Conclusion

Sentence 1- Summary

Essay

Women and men are commonly seen as having different strengths and weaknesses. Is it right to exclude males or females from certain professions because of their gender?

Males and females are often viewed as having differing skill sets. It is agreed that it is correct to exclude people from certain jobs on the basis of their gender, but only in very limited circumstances. This essay will first discuss how physical attributes prevent women from excelling in particular roles; secondly discuss how society at large rejects men from undertaking certain careers, followed by a reasoned conclusion.

For many years the general consensus in the armed forces is that women should not be allowed to participate in combat missions. This is because most women lack the brute strength required for this particular occupation and it is, therefore, right to prevent them from joining the ranks. For example, the American Army recently allowed some women to fight on the front line and the Department of Defence deemed the experiment a failure, due to lack of fighting effectiveness. Despite this, many women have fought in many wars, famously on the Eastern Front for Russia and the Viet Cong in Vietnam, so maybe it is men’s’ attitudes that prevent them performing rather than their stature.

Society has yet to accept men in many traditionally female positions, such as nanny or beautician. Businesses feel that it is fine to not hire men for these posts because most of their customers would not be willing to have a man perform that service. I personally know of one example when a friend failed at the interview stage when applying to become a kindergarten teacher because he was the wrong sex.

To summarise, in limited circumstances it is just to prohibit people from certain occupations, but only if they cannot physically perform or if the general consensus is that it is a single sex post.

(288 words)

I hope this has been of help to you and please let me know if you have any questions or feedback.

Image: 870606-frustrated-student

About Christopher Pell

My name is Christopher Pell and I'm the Managing Director of IELTS Advantage.

I started IELTS Advantage as a simple blog to help 16 students in my class. Several years later, I am very humbled that my VIP Course has been able to help thousands of people around the world to score a Band 7+ in their IELTS tests.

If you need my help with your IELTS preparation, you can send me an email using the contact us page.

55 Comments
Newest
Oldest Most Voted
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments

Primary Sidebar

Navigation

  • IELTS Preparation Guide
  • IELTS Writing Task 1 (In 2023)
  • IELTS Writing Task 2 (In 2023)
  • IELTS Reading (In 2023)
  • IELTS Speaking (In 2023)
  • IELTS Vocabulary
  • IELTS Listening
  • IELTS Tips
  • IELTS Practice: Ultimate Free Guide
  • IELTS For Teachers
  • IELTS Writing Correction Service

Footer

Contact us

Email: chris@ieltsadvantage.com
Over 2,000,000 collective followers!
Image: ielts-facebook
Image: ielts-instagram
Image: ielts-yt
  • Blog
  • Success Stories
  • Our Team
  • Our Principles
  • FAQ & Contact
  • Privacy Policy
  • Disclaimer
  • Terms and Conditions
  • About Author
  • Subscribe
  • IELTS VIP Ambassador Program
  • Cookies Policy
© 2021 IELTS Advantage All rights reserved. Registered Company Number NI637423. Advantage Exam Preparation Limited. 4 Castleglen Park, Dundrum, County Down, BT33 0WL United Kingdom. The information on this site is for information purposes only. IELTS is a registered trademark of University of Cambridge, the British Council, and IDP Education Australia. This site and its owners are not affiliated, approved or endorsed by the University of Cambridge ESOL, the British Council, and IDP Education Australia. For full information please refer to our terms and conditions and disclaimer.
wpDiscuz